The night I arrived we were driving back to the house and I saw a shooting star and my favourite song came on the radio. I have only ever seen three shotting stars in my entire lifetime and every one of them has been with Alex. The first was when Alex got back from Greece last year and we were sitting in a park at night. The second alex was walking me home and only I saw it and the third I have just mentioned. They are so special to me.

Alex told me he loved me July 11th. We were walking along the beach looking at a lighthouse and he decided to go nightswimming in his boxers! He came out and told me he loved me and nothing has ever felt so perfect before in my life.

I got on really well with his family and on the island we visited; Spetsey. I made a promise to myself as we were travelling back to the mainland on a small fishing boat. It was dark and the lights from the island still visible shined upon us. I promised myself that I will go back there. I have too. I cant bear the thought of not being there again.

He arrives back in 8 days and I already miss him so much. This time its real, its genuine and I do belive he loves me and I love him. I have to let go of everything and just be with him and enjoy it without worrying about what I look like. Otherwise we will lose each other again and I dont want to ever have to do that again.

Now Im back from Greece, left the perfect space in time I have to sort out the rest of my life. Ive been sitting at home on the computer doing nothing really and I feel stressed. I feel like im wasting my time but i can sit here if I want to and do nothing much. Theres two months left until I have to go back to college so I know I will have time to get my college work done but theres something else.

I know I go on about work all the time. Every time I think about it I get butterflys in my stomach. That is so wrong. alex says that if it stresses me out that much I should just move on and hes right. I have to bide my time though. If Paul has left then that could be a big problem already sorted out for me. Unless he decides to keep ringing and stuff. Even then though I can explain to him. I feel I can do it. I have to stick with it for a while until all the ripples of change have died down and some sense of normality returns. I will see what its like and then make my decision........