i've got the day off today, no work and no college so i suppose i really better get some college work done. i have so much to do and i have to start taking it seriously because i've got tons of exams but i just cant get started. yesterday, in film studies our teacher started screaming at us because we werent talking enough in class and then she started popping pills and mellowed out. i really felt like packing up my stuff and leaving but i've stuck it this far so i better carry on.

i'm seeng himself tonight when he finishes work tonight. it's getting really weird between us. i feel so in love with him and then he'll do something that will annoy me and does'nt think he's doing anything wrong and then he'll be so loving towards me. it's so unstable. on sunday he dragged me onto a double bed so we could both lay there and pretend we were married. he kept calling me Mrs .......... which was just too screepy!

i'm getting really stressed about money now. i wanted to have the money for all the christmas presents i want to buy and i have but theres a staff party thing for christmas and i have no money for an outfit or to actually go. on top of that everyone is going out on sunday for a meal and to get drunk and i just havent got the money. blah.