My windows wide open but it is still so hot in here. �Its getting hot in here so take off al your clothes� lol sorry could nt resist breaking out into a cliched song! :0)

I know I keep going on about it but Aargghhhhh damn the *censored* layout. I am so c.a.c at HTML. I have been trying to sort it out all day but its just not happening.

Its 2am and I just cant sleep now :0( Paul sent me a txt today asking if I want to meet up with him tomorrow :0/ I havent answered I don�t really know what to say. A few weeks ago I was actually thinking about leaving himself for Paul but thinking about it, the thought of losing himself again is awful. I have to try and make it work this time with none of my stupid relationship crap. I just cant help thinking how much easier it is to be single, sigh.

So back to Paul, he should take the hint by now. You don�t ask someone out a few days after a split. Sorry to sound like Keeleys stareotypical cheerleader impression but HELLO, REBOUND!!!! Oh Blah. Its getting hard to avoid going anywere near my place of work when I�m with himself. There is an option that could work, quit. HHhmmmmmm���

My nan is staying with us at the moment because its my dads birthday today. My grandad though is staying at home. I think hes very ill now and as for my dad he went to the hospital today to have a blood test but he hasn�t even told my mum why. We have so many secrets in this family its ridicoulous.

One of my best friends at college, Amelio has started cutting herself. No one else knows and I just don�t know what to do. Its so awful she has permenant cuts on her arms and she does it because of her mum and a certain boy that annoys her. I reason with her but she says that this makes the pain go away and that it doesn�t hurt. Oh God.

Ive finished all the exams for my AS levels and now have only my retake of GCSE maths to go. I don�t know how I can dream of actually getting to university when I cant even pass maths GCSE but there you go, that�s me. :0/

I met up with a friend, a best friend from school yesterday and either shes changed or me or both of us. We were only together for a few hours but couldn�t really think of anything worthwhile to talk about and then started talking about the pointlessness of life which cheered us both up! Lmao. Its crazy she and another girl caz were my bestest of all friends in that dreadful school and now we have all drifted so far apart.

I really cant sleep but I suppose I will try to as my nans leaving early tomorrow and I have to be awake to see her off����

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Sklob cant sleep���.. I don�t know how I can be expected to pass maths if I havent even handed in my coursework, Im doomed. The exams in less than a week. I have a sneaky feeling that I�ll be taking it again next year.

I wonder if himself is home. He must be by now. We were going to go Opium tonight but my mum reminded me that its my dads birthday and my nan is coming over so there goes that idea!

Life is a funny thing!?!?!?!?!?

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